Sunday, February 28, 2010

Happy Week Day!

Guess what? It is official! I have graduated to the 2nd Trimester! That's right, I'm getting bigger. Today is the first day of the rest of my life! Woohoo! Did you know I grew 1/2 inch in just last week? I'm the size of a lemon. There is a saying that I have heard that makes me a little uncomfortable: when someone gives you a lemon, make lemonade! I didn't know what lemonade was so I looked it up. I don't like lemonade. Please Mommy, if you are reading this, keep the lemon! I'm much more sweet being whole. I'm not your average lemon.

Anyways, I woke up this morning to an annoying sucking sound. Sure enough, it was me. My lips are bigger and my mouth makes a louder sucking sound than normal. Oh well, I will just have to live with that. Anyways, I am scheduled to grow another half inch this week, so I need to get back to sleeping. Ciao!

- Bater

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Conferences Times of Boredom and Excitement

So Mommy and I started the conference yesterday. BORING! All I did was sit there and be a zombie. There was nothing for me to do. I put out a plug for help to any other embryos in the area, but no one responded. I think they were all put to sleep. I drifted off soon after. Later, in the evening, I woke up to a pleasant surprise... we were shopping! Mommy and Aunty were shopping for some clothing for me! I was wondering if I was going to have to live with the clothing I have in here or if I could get something new. Now how can I get it in here? Wait! I know! Mommy has a bellybutton. I get my food from a tube in my belly, I wonder If she can just send it that way? Now how can I get her to do that? I know... email!

- Bater

P.S. - oh woe is me! Mommy responded:

Dear Bater,
No. Get used to disappointments, your Mommy is a meany:)

Friday, February 26, 2010

We Just Can't Leave Daddy Alone

Mommy, my Aunt and I arrived to the conference last night. We wanted to show up for the paint in, an activity that is optional where the people all meet up and head to a location and paint, but we didn't make it in time. So we stopped off at Zion's and did some painting. Daddy is now jealous because he so wanted to take pictures. Anyways, back to the good story. Last night, Mommy and I were just getting ready for bed when we got an email. Daddy sent an email explaining that a House exploded about a mile away. There wasn't anyone in it, and no one was hurt, but the house was literally blown from the foundation. Nothing is left. Daddy said that he could feel the percussion wave shake our house. I tell ya, we just can't go anywhere without Daddy getting into trouble. I know he didn't blow the house up, but all the good stuff happens when I'm not there. Humph!

- Bater

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Cars, Trucks, and Snow Storms

So have you ever noticed, that when you are traveling, there is always something that will make you semi-nervous to start out? For some it's the cars on the road. The other drivers. Those who are crazy and you just don't know about. For others it's the trucks. Big rigs who have a tendency to dwarf those little cars on the road. For me, however, it's that snow storm sitting outside, waiting to pounce. It shouldn't be too bad once Mommy and I get going, but it does make me nervous. Actually, it makes Mommy nervous which in time increases the production of red bloodcells flowing into my amygdala. This in turns stimulates the neural pathways indicating that I am nervous. WOOOO! I need to watch this new brain of mine. It tends to run away from me at times. Oh well! Wish us luck!

- Bater

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Traveling Anxiety

I am SO excited for tomorrow! Mommy and I get to head to a conference down south. We get to stay in a nice hotel for relatively cheap and just relax... Ok maybe not relax, but I will get to meet new people. Oh yeah and my aunt will be coming along too. I am a little anxious about it though because Mommy still hasn't given me a travel itinerary nor can I figure out what to wear! I think that is the worst part of traveling. I often wake myself up with a start. I have bad dreams that I show up to an event with Mommy and Daddy, and I am just here in the womb naked, having forgot to get dressed. Oh well, let's just get going! I think I will schedule Mommy's wake up call for 5:30.

- Bater

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Will Work For Food

So Mondays are my Mommy and I's hardest day. Our schedule is so hectic that Mommy just doesn't have the time to feed me like I want. So this is my official cry: on Mondays I will work for food! Nothing special just maybe some pickles, apple sauce, cheese, bread, crackers, milk (skim and chocolate), apple, and maybe some lemon drops. That's all I need to make it to dinner. But alas, last night I maybe got half of that and to top it off for dinner I got pickles and peaches ( not together). That was it! How sad is me... :-( I LOVE YOU Mommy! ;). Now where is that bowl of sherbet...

- Bater

Monday, February 22, 2010

My Little Patch of Mommy

Well I got it! The baby land rush was great! I found a little place next to a river of red bloodcells. It has a field for my farmville horse and plenty of room to grow! You know, over the last few days I have been reflecting on the many changes my body has been going through. I often ponder on things like: how do I prevent moving uncontrollably to if one red bloodcell left my tummy traveling at 2 miles an hour and 1 hour later a second left traveling at 4 miles an hour, when and where would they intersect? I tell you, that last one is the one that keeps me up all night long! That's a baby secret. We are always moving at night because we have one thought that keeps us up. Anyways, the place is great and now I am ready for a lot of growing.

- Bater

Sunday, February 21, 2010

Happy Week Day!

I am now officially 13 weeks old! Wow! I have noticed that my head is shrinking! Ok not really. My head is the same but my body is catching up. My head is only 1/3 the size of my body. I am now the size of a shrimp. If you thought I was growing fast before, I just doubled my size to 3 inches in 2 weeks! Crazy!

So last night I was just minding my business when a knock on the door came. I went and opened the door and in rushed the baby police! They held me down and put some kind of ink on my fingertips and pressed them to a piece of paper and then ran out. I managed to ask one of them what was happenig. They said that I now had fingerprints and they needed to start tracking my growth. I told them well shoot if you want that, just follow my blog! They didn't know about my blog. When they found out they said: oh sorry about that. They returned the paper and gave me a 5% off coupon for Papa John's Pizza. Strange night.

- Bater

P.S. - too bad I don't like pizza.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

The Great Baby Land Rush of 2010

So it's official... I'm on the move. I have been living down in Mommy's pelvic bone for this whole while, but now I am getting bigger. I need more room, so I am heading North in the great baby land rush of 2010. I think I am going to look for some space next to a red bloadcell river. I would like some space with a nice wide pasture I can let my Horse, from facebook farmville, go and roam free. So hopefully, there will be no competition...but you never know, someone may get there before me!

- Bater

P.S. - no I am not on facebook, they won't let anyone younger than 1987 register, so I had to hack them with Daddy's account and make my own virtual world. Oh well.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Questions About My Developing Body

So today, I thought I would ask some questions I have been having for a little while. I have been pondering them and would just like to see what you think.

1. I've noticed that there are little hairs all over me, but what are they for?
2. My fingers are flexible and bendable, however, now my toes are bending as well. Why do my toes bend, I never use them?
3. My mouth all of sudden, this week, started to protrude outward in a strange fashion, as if I was to suck on something. What do I put in it?
4. Why do I have reflexes? I just twitch all the time and it is kinda annoying.
5. I have noticed that my eyes have moved from the sides of my face to the front. Weird?
6. What is my favorite color?
7. What will be my name?
8. What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Ah the wonders of baby life.

- Bater

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Broken Buttons and Favorite Olympic Competition

So it is official, Mommy's sick button is broken! I kept pushing it over and over that it finally just has stopped working. I can't seem to make her REALLY sick anymore. Also, her energy button is working again. I guess my couch was parked on the cord. I was moving things the other day and found it. Sorry Mommy!

So I think I have found my favorite Olympic competition: Downhill Trampoline Jumping! It is so much fun. I put the trampoline on sleds and then push it down the hill all the while jumping up and down. I found that turn 8 is the worst. There happens to be one of Mommy's nerves right there. Every time I make that turn, I crash and Mommy feels it. Sorry again Mommy! Boy, I really need to re-model in here to get a little more room. I here a project! ;)

- Bater

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Too Many Pickles

So I think I over did it last night. I started asking Mommy for sunflower seeds and pickles. Dill pickles. She just kept eating them. I thought they were really good so I kept saying more and more. Now, I think I am pickled in here. The most appropriate song for the situation is: bed knobs and broomsticks' beautiful briny sea.

"Bobbing along on the bottom of the beautiful briny sea."

I now know what a pickle feels like. I am dilled and just bobbing up and down in here. Now if I can just figure out how to cure myself with salt, I could stay in here for a REALLY long time.

- Bater

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Watching the Walls Get Closer

Lately, as I have been reading a lot on the internet, learning more and more about what is out there, I have stumbled upon a very interesting word: claustrophobia. There are people who are morbidly afraid of the walls closing in on them. Well I am here to tell you, as part of my recovery: my name is Bater and I am claustrophobic. Each day I see Mommy's stomach walls getting closer and closer to me as I grow bigger and bigger. I don't like it very much. Right now I am trying too push as many buttons as possible to let Mommy know I don't like it, but here soon I will need to start kicking harder to let her know I don't like it. I know, I know, I'm an embryo. I should like the enclosed space, but you know what? You try rolling over and sticking your finger in your eye and then having to suck on it to comfort you from the pain. Oh well, maybe I can sleep more during the day?

- Bater

Monday, February 15, 2010

The Road Home

So today we are heading home from grandma and grandpa's. We are going to be going straight through so we have an 8 hour drive ahead of us. I don't know if I am going to make it! I really don't like driving for more than an hour at a time. Oh well, we have to get home. So I think I am starting to get the hang of this whole growing thing. I am in grade: 12 weeks of the elementary trimester, so I am the top dog in my school. I'm a little scared to have to move in 2 weeks because I will have to start back at being the smallest embryo in the placenta, but that's ok, I will grow and all will turn out. Well, back to sleep I head, I just hope there aren't a lot of bumps.

- Bater

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Happy Week Day!

Heh Heh Heh! This week is going to be FANTASTIC! My reflexes are coming in! Happy week day all. I am roughly the size of a Lime. I am so going to have fun this week. Each day I can feel more and more thoughts forming in my mind as more and more neural pathways are being created. You know for a while now, my intestines have been in the umbilical cord, but hey are finally coming back into me. Finally, as well, my kidneys are starting to work! It's awesome, I guess they produce this thing called urine. I wonder what it's for?

Anyways, since today is Valentine's Day, I wanted to take a moment and send a Valentine to my Mommy and Daddy. So here it goes:

To Mommy:

.--. ,--.
\\ .' : `. //
Y`. : .'Y
: `.|_:_| .' :
| .-'(_)`-. |
.-\( ._|_. )/-.
.' /``-.___.-''\ `.
.' .="""=. .="""=. `.
/ _/ | _V _ \_ \
! '\ |__(_)\/(/_ /` !
\ ) ( /
`---' \/ `---'
__ .' `. /(_)(_| .'.`. __
.'..`-' .' `. .' `.`-'..`.
( ( `.`: >. .< ;'.' ) )
\ \hjw\ ; .' `.' `. : / / /
`.`._/ : .' `. : \_.'.'
`.__.~' `~.__.'

To Daddy:
I Love you too! Now treat Mommy well! Don't make me come out there!

- Bater

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Baby Olympics 2010 - Opening Ceremonies

Last night the winter olympics started with the opening ceremony in Vancouver British Colombia, Canada. It was a very cool ceremony. I got to see it streamed over the Internet. Of course all I could see was red as my eyes STILL won't open, but I had my own images in my head and I could hear just fine. Well, in honor of the lighting of he Olympic Torch, I have decided I am going to have my own Baby Olympics. Last night, right after the lighting of the Torch, I had my own opening ceremony.

Picture this... I climb up into Mommy's stomach and then a big booming voice says: week 1, week 2, ... You get the picture. The whole thing while working up to week 11, there is a video re-capping my growth, HD or course, and when we get to week 11 - I coming popping down from above, Mommy's stomach, and spin and twist then I raise my hands up in the air, my bones are almost in, and attempt to say: Welcome to the 2010 winter Baby Olympics!

Well, with there only being me in here, the parade of nations went really quick. I had to hold my own sign, flag and make my own announcement and operate the spotlight. It was a nice ceremony. I finished the night off by rather than light a flame, as Mommy wouldn't probably like that, I pushed her potty button! Let the Games begin!

- Bater

Friday, February 12, 2010

I'm Getting Bigger

So it's official: car rides and I don't agree! I'm starting to fill up the space in here, but the seat belts and the clothing Mommy has, both come right over the top of me! That just makes me feel sick and so, I push Mommy's sick button also, so that she knows I don't like it! The drive to Great Grandma's was beautiful! I even got to try some new food! Vinegar and salt potato chips and funyuns. Mommy had a blast eating those because I have augmented her taste buds so it was an extra blast of flavor for her. Daddy made fun of Mommy's reaction. It was almost too much for her. Well, we better get up and get going, that is my cue to go to sleep. It's kind of strange, all of a sudden my body wants to start sleeping during the day and moving at night. Hmmmm.... I wonder why that is? Anyways TTYL ( I just learned that from some chat friends)

- Bater

Thursday, February 11, 2010

On The Road Again

Woohoo! We are heading out of town today! I am Sooooooooooo excited! Can you believe it? We're headed back to where the world found out I was coming...Colorado! Now where are my riding pants? Mommy has hers and Daddy likes riding with comfortable clothing, I have to find my riding pants. They are nice and baggy and I can stuff tons of red blood cells in them so I can snack as we go.

Road trips are fun. They give you the opportunity to see things you don't normally get to see. You get to be with the people you love and, if they start to get on your nerves, there is always an end. Mommy and Daddy play games, read books, listen to music, talk and make up interesting stories as they drive along. Now, I know that there are cool things along the way, however, I don't know what is between GJ and Provo, as it was all white and packed when we came back last, I hope there is milk involved though, with tiny little marshmallows shaped like charms. (Daddy wrote that last part. I left the computer unlocked. Note to self, change the password) Anyways, we are well and, world... here I come again!

- Bater

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

The Star Wars Effect

So I have to admit: I Love Star Wars. I was surfing the web a couple of weeks ago and I saw a mention to the movie. I went and rented the first one, not the prequel but episode 4, and I loved it! It's great! Having said that, yesterday was definitely one of those Star Wars days. There's a part in the movie where Han Solo says "hold on to something" or someting like that, and then nothing happens. Well that's how the day started out. Mommy, Daddy and I were slow to get going. We tried all we could but we just couldn't. Well later in the movie Han tries again and it works. Lights start to stretch and boom, they're off. That was what happened after we left. It was all a blur! Mommy and I had our class until 700. Then we had a meeting that went until around 830 or 900. We got home, crashed and then went to bed at 10. I tell ya, if you ever have one of these kinds of days, it definitely qualifies for the Star Wars effect! Now I'm going back to sleep, even if Mommy can't. I'm exhausted!

- Bater

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

A Note to Mommy

Dear Mommy,
Thank you for the food you eat.
Crackers, Veggies and little meat.
Thank you for the clothes you wear.
Tummy bands, wider jeans and shirts that make people stare.
Thank you for the places you go and the people we see.
Car rides, work, and friends we greet.
Thank you for being you.
Sweet and loving for I'm in you.

- Bater

Monday, February 8, 2010

E != MC2 (only)

I have to say, I have had a lot of wonderful surprises of late. I had originally thought that energy comes from milk and crackers. I like them in the morning and love milk every now and then. Well I am now here to tell you that Energy is NOT equal to Milk and Crackers Squared only! Mommy tried some protein bars yesterday and she liked some. Ok...really I liked them! ;) Anyways, I had another new food last night, lentil soup! Oh that was good. I love food! I am getting to sample wonderful foods and really liking them all. There is still one thing that I can just NOT handle and that is Chocolate! Chocolate, you are not my friend!

- Bater

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Happy Week Day!

Good Morning all! I am NOW the size of a Fig! Can you believe it? Anyways, last night, I was just sitting around, and I started to feel something a little strange. I started to feel that my arm was hardening. All of a sudden I started to realize that some of my bones were starting to harden. This is WONDERFUL! I am starting to become a real ... (Remember I am guarding my secret until later.) Anyways, I also started to open my mouth, and low and behold, I have TEETH coming in, or rather the tooth buds under my gums are starting to come in. One last thing....I have hiccups! You know what, I didn't even know what they were until I looked them up on google. It took me a while and all of sudden, I found out they were hiccups. Well, they are a little weird, and I don't think Mommy felt them, I think I am still too small for that. Well, I need to get going to my next class. Talk to you later.

- Bater

Saturday, February 6, 2010

New class: SWIL 115

Did you know that, here inside, we fetuses begin to swallow in the 10th week? Well we do. And yesterday I started my first class about it. It is Swallowing While In Liquido 115 or SWIL 115. This is a tough class. It's a Spanish emersion gym class. They make you run laps swallowing and reciting Spanish phrases. The final is swallowing for a mile and stopping after every swallow to recite different phrase from the original Don Quixote alternating between chilango and castellano dialects. Tough I'm telling you. I don't know if I can make this one. Anyways... Mommy did better yesterday. All is well in here and I am stoked for my Week Day tomorrow. I have 3 more weeks before I am OUT of the first trimester: Woohoo!

- Bater

Friday, February 5, 2010

What a Busy Day!

Yesterday was a BUSY day. Mommy and I had another dr.'s appointment. While there they played this horrible elevator music, and though I was already nervous, that music added to my anxiety. As I was sitting around just minding my own business, I felt this poking prodding instrument. It poked me and scared me, so I ran to the other side of my apartment. Then it did it again and followed me around. It turns out they were trying to hear my heart beat, but I was too shy. Daddy was so excited, I could hear him from inside! Finally it stopped. A few minutes later another instrument started pushing in through Mommy's belly, but I was alright, it was a camera and I got a new picture taken.

Can you believe it? I'm 1 1/3 inches long! I grew an inch in a month! No wonder I have growing pains and stretch marks.

So after that, Mommy had a bad headache, so we went home and she slept. I didn't like that much, though, because I didn't get anything to eat for 5 whole hours, so hit the puke button. I think I went a little overboard though, I kept doing it until we went to bed around 11:15. Oops! So I think I am going to treat Mommy a little nicer today and give her a break...however if I don't get my food, I just might push that button again.

- Bater

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Nicknames and Rumors

So I love to hear nicknames for people. They are fun. Mine is Bater, mommy's is Incu and Daddy's is Waiter. My friend pyler has all sorts of names for Mommy and Daddy. The top few are:
For Mommy
1. Dan
2. Maydan
For Daddy
1. Gike

Now for the good stuff. The rumors are flying. Yesterday Mommy went to work and she had a student ask her if she was pregnant, because she looked pregnant. Mommy responded saying that if he were she would announce it when she was ready. It appears that I am making a larger appearance than I thought. Don't worry I have no where but out to go from here.

- Bater

P.S. After I penned the last line, everything shook. I think Mommy just groaned.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Tuesday Bombie and Zommy

Mommy had class last night. We went until 7 pm. She and I were EXHAUSTED! We came home and crashed. We were literal zombies! Daddy's brains looked so delicious. Luckily, Daddy had an anti zombie solution of bread. The roll looked like a brain to a bombie and zommy. Worked well. So then, Mommy felt more and more sick last night. We finally ALL went to bed around 10-10:30. It's all good...each Tuesday, when the moon comes out, look around and you just might find a bombie and zommy. Until tomorrow....

- Bater

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Ground Hog Day

Today is Mommy's favorite theme day! She loves to watch Groudhog's Day the movie with Bill Murray, only on Groundhog Day! I don't quite understand the movie. I think the holiday is a VERY bad holiday. Can you imagine? A bunch of people who get together and rip a poor defenseless animal out of it's warm little home, just so they can say whether it saw it's own shadow? (Which by the way, he did see his own shadow.) I sure hope they don't do something like that with me! Take me out and then, if I see my shadow say, "six more weeks of pregnancy!" So today I am speaking out: Babies Against GroudHog's Day! I am creating a group. Personally I think I have this thing BAGD! ;)

- Bater

Monday, February 1, 2010

Radiator Mommy

Lately Mommy has been cold, very cold. She is always wrapped up in a blanket. What makes it all the more interesting is the fact that when Daddy gives her a hug she is extremely hot to the touch! She's a radiator! She keeps her warmness close to her body but then every now and then it just gets unbearable and it radiates out more. Isn't pregnancy awesome?!

Anyways, last night I was sitting just minding my own business when I looked down at my, now non-webbed toes, and thought wouldn't that be cool to touch them? And my arm twitched! It really twitched! I couldn't move it completely but it moved. Cool! My nerves are starting to come in! You are looking at the proud Fetus of a nervous system! I think it will be well ahead of the class in intelligence. I know. I know. That's what all the fetuses say. ;)

- Bater